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NOT-SO-OBVIOUS SIGNS THAT YOU'VE FINALLY GROWN UP (aired 10/8)
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1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can’t smoke any of them.
2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.
3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.
4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.
5. Your friends marry and divorce instead of “hook up” and “breakup.”
6. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.
7. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as “dressed up.”
8. You’re the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won’t turn down the stereo.
9. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.
10. You don’t know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.
11. You feed your dog “Science Diet” instead of McDonald’s leftovers.
12. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.
13. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.
14. A four dollar bottle of wine is no longer “pretty good stuff.”
15. “I just can’t drink the way I used to” replaces “I’m never going to drink that much again.”
16. Ninety percent of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.
Finally, the most obvious sign that you've grown up - you're looking for at least one thing on this list that actually DOESN"T apply to you! |
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